I know - I said in an earlier blog that I would post more this year and I epically failed at that! So no promises this time - I will blog when the spirit moves me to - and it moved me to tonight because if someone had been filming me this evening, I could have easily won $10,000.....sometimes I think I should have my own sitcom.....heavy sigh.....so go ahead and have a laugh at my expense - that's why I am writing it! :)
To set the scene - I should tell you that if you don't know me really well, you might think I am a good cook...so wrong! People think this because in another life I sold Pampered Chef - but PC is for dingalings in the kitchen like myself. Robbie is the real cook in our house - he even enjoys it, but to me, it is as bad as cleaning pottys! Some of my hostesses will attest to my clutziness in the kitchen....like the time I made this beautiful crust on a PC stone and turned around to take it from the oven to the counter and it just slid off like it was on a ski slope! (yes that really happened)
So a couple of weeks ago, I was asked to accept the mission of making 3 dozen muffins for the Junior class to have for breakfast tomorrow morning - hopefully they are having something besides my muffins. Mind you - I wasn't going to make fancy ones - I bought mixes - I can be a clutz but I am NOT stupid! Two mixes were the kind that has a little can of blueberries in them - bought those at Aldi's because that was all they had - the other was the simple Martha White - add milk, pour them up - bake - done. The Martha White mixes went off without a hitch. First task on the other mixes was to open the blueberries and drain them - the instructions said to put them in a strainer - which I couldn't find one with small enough holes that would keep the blueberries from falling out. So my idea was to open the can most of the way and then just drain off the juice, which worked okay until I pushed a little too hard and the top pushed inside the can. I couldn't get it to come out - so I squeezed the can and was able to pry the end of a butter knife up under the lid to get it up.....however, it was stuck a little too much and POPPED open which proceeded to spray berries and juice all over the kitchen and my face. (If I look a little blue this week when you see me, you will know why)...so most of those berries were wasted - so I doubled the recipe with the other box so they could share berries. This time I thought it would be a better idea (and therefore avoid the juice incident again) to pour the berries into my hand and let the juice run through my fingers.....bad idea....lost a few more that way but all in all there were enough berries in the muffins.
I had to clean up my mess, so I got another batch in the oven (if don't bake a lot, you only own one muffin pan) and proceeded to clean. In another effort to be a better mother (since I have been traveling so much), I had bought groceries to cook all week - mind you this is a HUGE stretch for me - we eat out A LOT. One of the recipes had called for sliced avocado (please don't tell Tyler). The little California ones were brown at the grocery store - so I opted for the huge Florida ones. (Another mistake on my part) Somehow while cleaning up blueberry juice (which by the way will only come off the cabinet tops with bleach) I caught the avocado bag with the rag I was using and slung one of them right into the floor....they were REALLY ripe....that skin just burst and sent green goo everywhere again.....
Meanwhile, I didn't know that when the timer goes off and you turn off the timer, it also turns off the oven, so I am thinking that something is wrong with my oven because it won't stay hot....I kept turning it on and it kept losing heat...ok so maybe that part was more stupid than cluzty.
Did I tell you I didn't enjoy cooking? The moral of this story is if you don't like to cook - offer to buy drinks.
